Chop House Burger (dining review)

A dining review from The Bleacher Bum.

CHOP HOUSE BURGER is an upscale burger joint with a down home feel.  It is located in downtown Dallas on Main Street. The dine-in seating is very limited and the lunch crowd is pretty big.  The crowd is big because the burgers deliver the goods. They have a basic cheeseburger and five specialty burgers. They also provide a veggie burger and chicken sandwich. I tried the Buffalo Wild Burger. It made an impact.  The meat, cheese, and sauce were all flavorful but not overpowering. I ordered the parmesan french fries, and they were almost better than the burger. The only knock against CHB is that all the burgers can get quite messy, but there are napkins aplenty. Grade A-.

In-N-Out Burger

A dining review from The Bleacher Bum

In-N-Out Burger: Claude M. Bristol once said, “We usually get what we anticipate.”  I admit I don’t have a clue who Claude M. Bristol is or what he did or wrote. But I do have a clue that Claude M. Bristol DID NOT say this quote after eating an In-N-Out burger, after hearing for a decade how special the burgers are. I ordered the basic cheeseburger and fries. (They only have three burgers on the menu.)  And “basic” might be the best word to describe the burger. The ingredients were fresh, and the meat was properly cooked. But there was nothing about the burger that justified even 20% of the hype or the ridiculously long line in the drive-through. I will give In-N-Out a second chance, but in the meantime you can find me at Whataburger or Braums. GRADE: C-.

Heart Attack Grill (dining review)

The Movie Snob rates Dallas cuisine.

Heart Attack Grill.  Some colleagues and I put our lives on the line in order to try this new hamburger joint in downtown Dallas’s West End district.  We cannot recommend it.  In fact, we urge you to steer clear.  Personally, I like the food at Hoffbrau in the West End much better, and there’s always The Angry Dog or Twisted Root if you’re willing to drive down to Deep Ellum.

First, the HAG is way too gimmicky.  The waitresses are dressed as nurses, and they make you put on a hospital-style wristband and hospital gown when you come in.  How often do they wash those gowns?

Second, the menu is quite limited.  You can get a burger with up to four meat patties, french fries fried in pure lard, buttermilk milkshakes, and beer, Coca-Cola, or bottled water to drink.  There are no plates, glasses, or ice.  Oh, and it’s cash only; no credit cards accepted.

Third, I could have overlooked the gimmicks and the small menu if the food had been good, but it just wasn’t.  Everything was way oversalted.  The fries were hard and tough.  I thought the burger was average, but my three dining companions all found their burgers overcooked and dry.  One of us had bacon on his burger, and he said it added no smoky flavor to his burger at all.  I should add that none of us got a milkshake, so they might be fine.

Finally, the place is too expensive.  A single-patty burger, fries, and a coke cost me $12 before tip.  Admittedly, the fries are large enough (or salty enough) that you could share an order with someone without going hungry and thereby save a buck or two that way.

I’m sorry to say it, but skip the Heart Attack Grill.

Beer review: 55 Select

From The Bleacher Bum

Budweiser 55 Select: The “King of Beers” is trying to position itself as the king of healthy drinking with the release of 55 Select. 55 represents the number of calories per 12 ounces. I picked up a six pack this weekend for a taste test. I truly liked it. The beer is smooth; tastes like beer; has no after-taste; not filling; and tastes better the colder it gets. Budweiser succeeded where MGD 64 didn’t.

Bleacher Bum Grading Scale: Homerun, Triple, Double, Single, Strikeout

Grade: Double

MGD 64

The Bleacher Bum contributes our first ever beer review. (That Guy Named David hangs his head in shame.)

The ultra light beer market is getting really competitive. Michelob Ultra has been the frontrunner, but other beer companies are getting into the mix. I tried Budweiser Select a few weeks ago, while watching the Texas Longhorns dismantle the Florida Atlantic Owls. I was pleasantly surprised. It was very smooth, tasted like beer, and had no aftertaste. It wasn’t great though. Last night, I thought I would try MGD 64. In high school, Miller Genuine Draft was my favorite beer. It is what my uncle and older brother drank. So, it is what I stole from them and drank in my parents’ garage.

MGD 64 was awful from the first sip to the last bitter end. It tasted and smelled terrible. It tasted like stale 7-UP mixed with sour lemonade with a shot of cologne. I drank one and put the rest in the refrigerator. I will finish the six-pack (I don’t throw away beer no matter what.), but I doubt I will enjoy it. Avoid at all costs….unless it is free.